We spend too much time thinking about doing something
“I’m fixin’ to get ready to…”
Yep, guilty here. I like to contemplate, think about all of the things that could go well, go wrong or go sideways. I spend a lot of time in my head. I also like to research things, and find the perfect picture or quote or whatever to go with the thing.
Maybe this goes back to my days as a Psych major in college. I spent a lot of time in the library, looking through texts, microfiche or microfilms – I can’t remember the difference. Anyway, I spent a lot of time scrolling through documents on that crazy projector thing. Ahhhh, the days before the internet really took off. I remember them well!!
The reality is that this can really be boiled down to 1 very simple thing:
PROCRASTINATION
Because, even though it’s important to research, and plan and get all the little ducks in a row…we tend to do this to the point of not actually taking action on our project, our goal, our plan. We are stewing in our thoughts, ideas and plans.
This becomes a problem because we end up talking ourselves out of doing the thing or starting something new or restarting a goal because of overthinking.
What do you think?
Is there something that you have wanted to do for as long as you can remember and it pops up in your head every few months or few years? You think about how much joy or satisfaction or confidence that thing will bring or the actions will show, but you then quickly think of all the things that get in the way – the work schedule, that school drop offs, sports, church activities, spouse’s schedule, etc.
OR your brain going into FIGHT, FLIGHT or FREEZE mode. You think, I can’t possibly think I am going to go back to school at my age? Who am I to think I can write a book? My running days are over, why would I even entertain the idea of doing a 5k? That ship has sailed, I will never be a professional photographer. I should have continued with my passion for fashion after college, I am too old to think I can get into that industry? 3 kids, 40+ years, I can’t possibly get into the shape I want. I am on so many medications, how can I get back to a healthy state?
We, as humans, are wired to do this. Our brains are designed to protect us when we try to veer off course, try something new, or want to do something outside of our comfort zones.
This is completely NORMAL!
BUT, think about a time that you pushed past your comfort zone. Maybe you tried for a promotion at your job, maybe you got the job or maybe you didn’t but I bet there were feelings of doubt and anxiety, feelings that you shouldn’t do it, you can’t do it or you don’t have everything they are looking for. But you went for it anyway!
For my fellow moms out there, when you were pregnant with your first kid (in my case, I got a 2 for 1 deal) and even taking care of your baby, toddler, school aged kid, etc. Did you feel 100% ready? Did you get pushed out of your comfort zone, like, a million times?
I remember when my husband and I decided to talk to our girls about sex. I was pregnant with our son and they were VERY curious about how babies are made, and they were only 7. I was not ready, I mean I could not even figure out how to tell them or what to say. They were persistent and then one day in the kitchen my husband said,
“Are you sure you really want to know?” and they said, “Yeah!”
We have always had the philosophy or approach to be as truthful as possible, but I was standing behind a wall where the girls couldn’t see me waving my hands and saying no, we can’t, I’m not ready, and he’s like, “OK, I’ll tell you.”
Their reaction, “Oh, that’s it?” And they went about their evening.
My point is, we build things up in our heads to be much bigger and scarier than they are, sometimes. We think our loved ones may react to us with shock, or disbelief if we tell them that we want to try our shot at going on The Voice, or whatever the dream may be. We think we may be booed off stage, or criticized or we might puke or pass out.
Here’s the thing…all of those things could happen, but what if you succeed?
Or what if you learn something and realize your dream is a little different than you thought but you have built the confidence up to follow your dream, run the 5k, write the book, join the community group, start the podcast, travel to another country, get the promotion?
What if...
Whate if you do something right now that you have been waiting to do?
Like, right now.
You know what I’m talking about because it just popped into your head. 1 step in the right direction will shift your perspective.
You will realize it took very little time. You will feel more confident. You will start building belief that the thing you have been wanting and have been thinking is too far out of your reach, is actually not that far.
Take 1 step forward.
Do 1 thing today.
Sign-up for the course, sign-up for the 5k, create a grocery list and leave off the unhealthy snacks or sodas, reach out to someone and ask them to mentor or coach you, research jobs in the market (and apply for 1).
Whatever the 1 thing is, this step will show you that it’s not so hard, the time you have today or next week will somehow not feel so limited or you won’t feel like you don’t have enough of it.
This is a practice.
Take the first step toward your goal today.
Part II coming later this week.
XO,
Jen
